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Personal dilemma

My girlfriend works a later shift and often times, she and her co-workers bring in food or order it in.  Potlucks, or Thai food, that sort of thing.  Well, today, they had spam and eggs.

You read that right – not ham and eggs but spam and eggs.  I said to her “Uh, you do know what I do for a living, right?”  It’s still a somewhat new relationship and she doesn’t grasp the gravity of my personal awesomeness.  She knows I work at Microsoft and that I hold some geeky job but doesn’t remember exactly what it is I do.  In response to the question she looked at me quizzically and I could tell she didn’t know (I’m great at reading facial expressions).  I answered my own question.  “I kill spam for a living!”

I had to explain to her that because of my anti-spam nature, I cannot even eat the canned food product made by the Hormel company.  The term spam has such a negative connotation that I cannot stomach the thought of eating SPAM.   I have conditioned myself to have negative associations with it and now am unable to separate the email annoyance from the food product.  I realize now that it is on my list of banned foods (along with kimchi, sauerkraut and milkshakes from Tech City Bowling).

She didn’t quite get that.  It takes a certain frame of mind to see things the way I do.

Comments

  • Anonymous
    June 24, 2010
    When you're older, perhaps once you've been married to your current of some future girlfriend for double-digit years, you'll reflect back on this entry and be ashamed.  Or older will fail to bring maturity and perspective, and you won't get it, and probably never will. I hope you get it.

  • Anonymous
    June 24, 2010
    Hmm.  I won't offer relationship advice.  Simply say that I have a pretty equal dislike of both kinds -- spam and Spam (tm).  Why in the world would someone bring that in?

  • Anonymous
    June 24, 2010
    I'm not sure if you're just being extremely theatrical, satirical and humorous, or you just have deep personal issues.

  • Anonymous
    June 24, 2010
    SPAM fried rice is delicious, unlike c!4L15-touting messages.

  • Anonymous
    June 25, 2010
    Heh.  Please understand that this post is quite tongue-in-cheek, which is why I put it in the Entertainment category and not Stories.

  • Anonymous
    June 27, 2010
    Now you know why I wont eat apples :-)